Grandpa had given me a chore of taking a pile of bags filled with seed that was delivered earlier and putting them into the store house. As I started on the first one I realized just how heavy they were and I was struggling with it. Grandpa saw me and came over to give me a helping hand. He looked at me and smiled as only he could then took the bag and tossed it over his shoulder as if it weighed no more than a pillow of feathers. When he had finished putting it into the shed he just looked at me and said,
"Life can be good or a pain in the butt at times, yet we need both whether we like it or not. We need the good times to really enjoy what life has given us but also we need them to realize that the bad times are just a temporary situation. The problem lies in the how long. The good times cannot forecast the length of the bad times in life just as the bad times cannot forecast how long the good times will be.
Some would call life as one huge classroom from which we can learn all about ourselves. The lessons, at times, are very harsh but those lessons are the ones we need the most. It is from these lessons that determine our growth. Without them, we remain as little children dependent upon others.
There are some who think that they can alleviate those bad times but in doing so do not realize what they would be eliminating. It would be like creating a world of Peter Pan. Many are smitten with the idea and many would like to live in this Never Never land. They would accept the idea without ever realizing that they are giving up more than they’ll ever know, the opportunity to grow up and be real adults.
This does not mean that we do not need help at times. Nor does it mean that in the acceptance of this help we are less than adults. It does mean though that we need to know when assistance stops being help and becomes dependency. It is here that we must search within ourselves to ascertain the difference. It is here that we as human beings and individuals must be sure that a line is drawn and know that it is a line that must never be crossed.
Now, boy, I have helped you in putting this bag of seed into the shed where it belongs. The rest will be up to you. The rest are just as heavy but you have a choice, call on me to assist you or go into the barn and get the hand truck and do it yourself. You can depend upon me or help yourself, the choice is yours."
He then turned his back on me and went back to the task he was doing without further word.
I just looked at the bags, then looked at grandpa and grinned in a mischievous manner then started walking to the barn.
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11 comments:
Hi Griper,
For this one, I just have a verse.
"2) Carry each other's Burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. 3) If anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself. 4) Each one should test his own actions. Then he can take Pride in himself, without Comparing himself to somebody else, 5) for each one should carry his own Load." (Galations 6:2-5, NIV)
Verses 2 and 5 contain a Contrast. Where as, on the one hand, we are to "Carry each other's Burdens", on the other hand, "Each one should carry his own Load."
The word Burden in the Greek (Verse 2) means Weight and even the Abundance of, implying that something is Very Heavy. The word Load in the Greek (Verse 5) means a Task or Service. So in light of the Greek, this verse means that each one should carry his own Task, but it is Ok to seek help when it is too Heavy.
When I looked this up, I was surprised at the verses in the middle, Verses 3 & 4, which has to do with Pride. Verse 3 refers to those who have too much Pride and Verse 4 to those who at times have too little. Again a Balance and a Contrast.
Actually, the one Contrast; being willing to carry ones own Burden versing being willing to Ask for Help; relates to the other; too much Pride, verses too little. Those with too little Pride are not willing to do their part, yet those with too much Pride are not willing to ask for help.
This is a very good Post, BTW, Griper. Thanks.
We are headed for San Francisco for a few days. I'll visit more with you when we get back Later in the Week. Take Care.
you talked about "help" in these verses, lista, but what do these verses tell you of "dependency"?
You know me Griper,
I'm always talking about everything in relation to Extremes. Dependency is the Extreme of asking for and needing help. Asking for help needs to be kept in Balance. Self-Sufficiency can be taken to Extremes too, though, and this too needs to be kept in Balance, for it is not wrong to ask for help when help is needed.
i understood that, but a line needs to be drawn doesn't it or we risk becoming dependent without realizing it? we need to understand when that balance becomes unbalanced, as you say.
a liberal may say he only wants to help while a conservative would say that the liberal is making a person dependent. how do you compromise on that?
It would seem that we humans are a bit frail; and a bit dependent at times..as babies (or before, depending on life POV), when we are very old. Even the most independent folk accept assistance, say when trapped in wrecked burning vehicle. As we learned in the great depression,
when 30% of hard-working people can find no hard work they need
the support of their peers. Thus,
most primitive tribes accept and help the wounded stranger and the development of Judeo-Christian religion recognized this human need. The welfare concept does indeed 'enable'. It is said that most welfare recipients are white single moms. Efforts in that area are mixed to poor: they can be situated in a low-paying job in which most, if not all, earnings
pay for child-care..hence high
recitivism. Such cases are not only externally enabled...but internally trapped. I suspect no political solution is perfect...
But, I agree, the work ethic is learned in the home...which makes me wonder why my own kids are such hard workers! :)
he just nods at BB's remarks, so true.
as for the kids, that might be a good question for them, if nothing else, but just to see the reaction and response you would get.
we might also have to take into consideration the structure of society along with the laws in that society in regards to the idea of dependency or help.
it would appear that there is a correlation there also, urbanization versus rural life along with child labor laws. along those same lines is the idea of a mechanized society. seems to be many factors at work here which might lead us to understand why a certain way of life is becoming more desirable.
I would think that being self-sufficient if at all possible instead of being dependent would give most people a better sense of security, Griper.
Excellent post, but I came to expect that from you a long time ago. :)
In a related note to fending for ourselves is the recent phenomenon of the 'boomerang generation': leaving home, getting a job, or college, can't make it...and return home. There are about 6.2 million cases, and while it lowers the welfare roles, it is a form of
'assistance'..provided in many cases from old folks with their own limited resources. Whether the cause is laxy helpless kids, or lack of decent work...or both, I
cannot determine.
Oops. Typo correction: laxy should have been lazy. Although the semi-Freudian relation between
lax and lazy is of interest..:)
not to mention the children of some who are raised by their grandparents, like gayle. that is becoming a familiar story these days also.
even though i think these two situations have always been the norm of society but never publicized as we know it today. nor was it for the same reasons as we see it today either.
Yes Griper,
A line always has to be drawn between what is Reasonable and what is Extreme, that is my basic philosophy in a nut shell.
A line needs to be drawn, though, ON BOTH SIDES of this issue, not just the one side that you mentioned.
I just got finished making a comment on my own blog that relates to this...
"If we could just see more clearly the Positives and the Negatives within both points of view, we might actually be getting somewhere, yet too often we see only the Positives within our own point of view and only the Negatives within the other persons point of view.,"
To put this another way; "We have a tendency to see only the Extremes in the other Point of View and only what's Reasonable within the Point of View of our own Political Party." When both sides are doing this, it creates a "Fear of the Slippery Slope" and Reluctance to Compromise and this is the whole problem within Politics that we can't seem to get past.
What we need to realize is that both parties are made up of those who are Reasonable and those who are Extreme and quit viewing the entire Party as Extreme.BB,
You make very good points and one Extreme Republican idea would be to deny that there are times in which Dependence is inevitable. Such an idea misses the whole picture just as much as the Liberal idea that we should just give out hand outs and not worry about the problem of Enabling. Not all Republicans, though, are Unreasonable and Extreme, as too, neither are all Democrats.
Gayle,
Self-sufficiency is definitely the way to go if it can be accomplished, yet it is only when we succeed in doing so that we feel Secure. When we, for what ever reason, keep failing in this quest, the presence of some sort of Security Net of available help is needed in order for us to feel Secure.
BB,
You made an interesting list of what might possibly be wrong with the "Boomerang Generation" and relating it to the idea of Seeing Only Part of the Picture, some Republicans see only Laziness, while some Democrats see only Lack of Decent Work or Helplessness, leading to the need for help. Both of these groups are only seeing half of what is actually true.
Hopefully, what I'm saying is becoming more clear than it once was.
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