A Mother's Day

All of you girls, raise your hands if you have done the following.

Have You stop criticizing the way your mother raised you and wondered why?

Do You find yourself hiding in the bathroom just to be alone and wondered why?

Did you realize one day that You only have time to shave one leg at a time and wondered why?

OK, from this I’ll surmise that those who raised their hands are mothers. Those that did not, you know now what you have to look forward to when some guy seduces you into marrying him. Some more things will happen too.

You will swear that you hear your mother's voice coming out of your mouth every time you yell, "NOT in your good clothes!"

You will hire a sitter because you haven't been out with your husband in ages, then spend half the night checking on the kids.

You will use your own saliva to clean your child's face.

You will hear yourself saying “I’m tired tonight, Dear.” When you really mean “Haven’t I given you enough kids to carry on your family name?"

You will say at least once a day, "I'm not cut out for this job", but you know you wouldn't trade it for anything.

You'll wonder why that every time you get frustrated at the kids you will see your mother with a big grin on her face as she raises her eyes heavenward and whispers, ‘Thank you, Lord, the taste of a mother’s revenge is so sweet."

You will wonder why your father spent the time to plant a willow tree in the back yard of your first new home until that day you break off a switch to use on little Johnny.

I will only say, "Its in the genes, ladies."