Wednesday, January 23, 2008


It was grandpa’s and grandma’s wedding anniversary and a big party was thrown for them by the neighbors. They were one of the few left that was married to the same partner without a divorce. One of his friends yelled out; "Ok, what is your formula for being married to the same woman all of these years?"

Grandpa chuckled as he replied loudly, " Problems, my friend, problems. A marriage free of problems is not a marriage worth getting into."

A hush fell over the room and all eyes came to rest upon grandpa as they awaited his explanation. After a few minutes grandpa continued by saying;

" Marriage is a commitment for life and it needs a commitment because problems are an inevitable part of it. The solutions to the problems are the glue that makes a marriage stronger because both, the man and the woman, realize that they need each other to make that solution a reality. And from that commitment life will be fulfilled as it was meant to be.

Marriage is a relationship of trust, a trust that only marriage can bring about. It is a trust that each must have to know that each will fulfill his or her part in bringing about the solutions to the problems that are encountered. And from that trust faith will grow stronger.

Marriage is about forgiveness, forgiveness that only marriage seeks out. For it is forgiveness that is needed when you try to apply the wrong solution to a problem and create an even greater problem. And from that forgiveness, support of each other grows stronger.

Marriage is a relationship of hope, a hope that only marriage can fulfill. For it is in hope instilled that a man and woman will never part but remain united as one when a solution to a problem is needed. And it is in fulfillment of that hope that confidence in each other can only grow stronger.

Marriage is the essence of love, a love that only marriage can know the depth of. For only love will make a person give up all that he be and is so that he might allow another to be fulfilled in all that they can be. And it is in the knowledge of that love we can know ourself as we grow stronger as a person, husband, father, and friend. For we have found that strength in the one we have married.

Marriage is the answer to the age old problem of what are we and why do we exist? The answer is seen in the eyes of the one we married as we gaze deeply into her soul and find the reflection of the one she knows love for."

The room remained hushed as grandpa finished. Not a word was spoken to break the silence. But as I watched the people I saw each man gaze down at his wife and it seemed as if each had a brand new appreciation of what he possessed.

and I looked at grandma as she stood by grandpa's side, a tinge of red upon her warmed cheeks, I knew one thing. Grandpa may do a bunch of griping but there was one thing in his life that he has no gripes about. And you know what? Neither do I, neither do I.


WomanHonorThyself said...


The Griper said...

he chuckles, does that mean you liked it, woman?

Donald Douglas said...

"Marriage is about forgiveness, forgiveness that only marriage seeks out.'

You can say that again!!!!

The Griper said...

he grins, yes, day in and day out it seeks it.

dcat said...

What is there to forgive?

It’s a partnership and respect in our eyes.

My Mr. is one I can trust with my life. He is my climbing partner through life.

The Griper said...

we are human beings,dcat, and human beings make mistakes and mistakes are the result of poor decisions. it is the nature of our imperfection.

and when we make poor decisions our spouses and families must share the consequences of them as well as we do. it is when we make poor decisions that we need the support of those we love and who love us the most.

and it is by their show of support at these times that we can know forgiveness that be within their hearts.

Pam's Place said...

Beautifully expressed, Griper. I wish I had read this many years ago, and then I'd have known what was ahead of me. My husband and I have been married for 42 years -- we were the couple least likely to succeed. But we've gotten this far and plan to stay the course. He's a wonderful man, and I'm a very fortunate woman.

Sugarbabe said...

I like your idea of marriage to bad more don't see this in it..

The Griper said...

sometimes, pam, it is better not to know too. allows for mystery in a marriage.

thank you sugarbabe and welcome to my home on the web. hope you will come back often

dcat said...

I think I am missing the boat...

I guess Mr. and I are perfect. :D

Hey Griper,
You can’t make mistakes on rock climbs and live to tell about it.

Ya really gotta know what your doing other wise you ain't gona make it.

Your support is one that has you on belay as you set the course up the wall.

Now when your partner is following you up a wall cleaning the pitch. Now it is your turn to be there for them because now they are on belay and you are the belayee.

I guess it's the same translation as yours Griper. ;)

dcat said...

Oh and Griper it is good to know your partner inside and out.

Mystery will give you more gray hairs me thinks.

The Griper said...


mmm gray hairs are inevitable so i guess mystery is ever in a marriage. lol

Anonymous said...

Very nice, Griper. I worry about the high divorce rate and the total lack of committment among young people (which is why we have so many shack-ups and "baby daddies").

G.K. Chesterton remarked, in the 1920's when American divorce laws were relaxed, that if people can divorce for frivolous reasons, they'll find it all the easier tomarry for frivolous reasons.

The Griper said...

i agree, karen, divorce, like wars, should be a last resort solution to a problem in a marriage.

dcat said...

I am very independent Griper.

I think folks need to be responsible. I never got knocked up because that is not the kind of life I wanted. Everyone has a choice.

I never felt I needed anyone. You are born alone and you die alone. However if you find a good friend that you want to be with through life it is a big plus.

dcat said...

War is good when you fight for your freedom!

I'm not good at turning my cheek when I have been wronged!

I expect my country to up hold that freedom we have!

Oh wait LOL we were talking of marrage... ;)

The Griper said...

you were born alone? where was your mother at the time you were born, dcat?

i never considered any war as be good, dcat, only necessary at times. war is a time when too many people must suffer the consequences of the foolishness of the few.

he then laughs with her as he says yes this post is about marriage not war but i will admit that, at times, it would appear that there can be little distinction between the two. lolol

dcat said...

You come into this world alone and cold and screaming your lungs out!

Thank heavens I wasn't born to a family that kills girls!

War is very necessary when it comes to freedom! Survival skills come in handy.

You have to survive so you can save your mate. The folks that matter most!

Pulling out early is very annoying and leaves a person very, very dissatisfied.

I'm talking about war now ;) LOL

Ya gotta get the job done!

The Griper said...

he laughs. of course you were speaking of wars.

and yes you come into this world screaming your lungs out but only after a good whack on the rear end.

the he adds with a wicked playful grin; and all good girls continue to need a good whack on the rear end every now and then from that moment on. :) then he quickly covers his head.

dcat said...


You must be a muzzie!

Heh the doc. dropped dead the next day my mother said.

No one has dared to hit me since!

You better go hide Griper! ;)

The Griper said...

he just laughs with dcat. "yes, ma'am" he says in his most submissive tone.

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